This page teaches us that Torah isn't just for sharpening our minds, but for transforming our very being. It's about making our actions and character align perfectly with the Torah, so that we become a living Torah, not just someone who studies it. If we only take the wisdom without letting it shape us, it can, Heaven forbid, become a poison.
אָמְנָם הָאֱמֶת הוּא אֲשֶׁר לֹא הַמִּדְרָשׁ הָעִקָּר אֶלָּא הַמַּעֲשֶׂה.
Indeed, the truth is that not the study is primary, but rather the deed.
כִּי הַתּוֹרָה וְהָאָדָם אֶחָד הוּא.
For the Torah and man are one.
כִּי צָרִיךְ הַתּוֹרָה לְהַכְשִׁיר אֶת הָאָדָם אֲשֶׁר יִהְיֶה כָּל פְּעֻלּוֹתָיו וּתְנוּעוֹתָיו הַכֹּל שָׁוֶה בְּשָׁוֶה עִם הַתּוֹרָה בְּלִי נְטִיַּת יָמִין וּשְׂמֹאל,
For the Torah needs to prepare a person so that all his actions and movements will be completely equal with the Torah, without inclining right or left,
עַד אֲשֶׁר אִם נִכְתֹּב אֶת כָּל פְּעֻלּוֹתָיו יִכָּתֵב מֵהֶם תּוֹרָה שְׁלֵמָה,
until if we would write all his actions, a complete Torah would be written from them,
וְאֵין בֵּין הַתּוֹרָה בְּסִפְרָהּ לְהִתְוַותְּרָהּ בִּפְעֻלּוֹתֶיהָ,
And there is no difference between the Torah in its book form and its being actualized in one's actions,
אֶלָּא הָרוּחַ חַיִּים בִּלְבַד, כִּי הָאָדָם אֲשֶׁר הוּא חַי עַל פִּי הַתּוֹרָה,
Rather, only the spirit of life, for the person who lives according to the Torah,
הוּא מַמָּשׁ תּוֹרָה חַיָּה, כִּי אֶת כָּל הַכָּתוּב בַּתּוֹרָה לוֹקֵחַ אֶל הַחַיִּים וּמְסַדֵּר אֶת עַצְמוֹ וּמַחְלִיף אֶת מִדּוֹתָיו כְּמוֹ שֶׁהַתּוֹרָה דּוֹרֶשֶׁת מִמֶּנּוּ,
He is truly a living Torah, for he takes all that is written in the Torah into his life, and he arranges himself and changes his character traits just as the Torah demands of him,
וְהוּא בְּיַד הַתּוֹרָה כְּחֹמֶר בְּיַד הַיּוֹצֵר,
And he is in the hand of the Torah like clay in the hand of the potter,
וְלֹא דַּי אִם יִקַּח מִן הַתּוֹרָה אֶת הַחָכְמָה לְבַד,
And it is not enough if one takes from the Torah only the wisdom,
כִּי הַתּוֹרָה אֵינָהּ נְתוּנָה לָאָדָם בִּשְׁבִיל הַחִידּוּד בִּלְבָד,
For the Torah was not given to man solely for the sake of sharpening the mind,
אֶלָּא יֵשׁ לָהּ עַל הָאָדָם תְּבִיעָה יוֹתֵר גְּדוֹלָה וְיוֹתֵר גָּבוֹהַּ וְיוֹתֵר מֻכְרַחַת.
Rather, it has upon a person a greater claim, and a higher one, and a more essential one.
וּבְעֵת אֲשֶׁר הָאָדָם יִהְיֶה בִּבְחִינָה זֹאת אֲשֶׁר הַתּוֹרָה יִתְאַחֵד בּוֹ וְיִתְעַצֵּם בְּנַפְשׁוֹ לֹא יִסְתֹּר הוּא אֶת עַצְמוֹ כְּמוֹ שֶׁהַתּוֹרָה אֵין דָּבָר אֶחָד מִמֶּנָּה סוֹתֵר אֶת הַשֵּׁנִי.
And at the time when a person will be in this state, that the Torah will unite within him and become mighty in his soul, he will not contradict himself, just as in the Torah, no one thing from it contradicts another.
וְאִם לֹא יִקַּח מִן הַתּוֹרָה אֶלָּא חָכְמָתָהּ בִּלְבַד,
And if he will take from the Torah only its wisdom alone,
וְהָאָדָם שֶׁלּוֹ יִהְיֶה מִין אַחֵר וְחָכְמָתוֹ מִין אַחֶרֶת,
And his person will be of a different kind, and his wisdom of a different kind,
מִלְּבַד שֶׁהוּא שְׁנֵי הֲפָכִים בְּנוֹשֵׂא אֶחָד,
Aside from the fact that it is two opposites in one subject,
עוֹד יִתְהַפֵּךְ לוֹ חָכְמָתוֹ לְסַם הַמָּוֶת.
His wisdom will yet be turned for him into a deadly poison.
כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָמַר הַגְּרָ"א בְּפָרָשַׁת הַאֲזִינוּ "יַעֲרֹף כַּמָּטָר לִקְחִי",
As the Gra said on Parashas Haazinu, "My teaching will drop like the rain," (Devarim 32:2).
כִּי הַתּוֹרָה כְּמוֹ טֶבַע שֶׁל הַמָּטָר שֶׁמַּצְמִיחַ הַכֹּל אִם יַעֲלֶה עַל סַם הַמָּוֶת יַצְמִיחַ סַם הַמָּוֶת וְאִם יֵרֵד הַמָּטָר עַל עֲשָׂבִים שׂוֹרְפִים יַצְמִיחַ עֲשָׂבִים שׂוֹרְפִים,
For the Torah is like the nature of the rain, which causes everything to grow: if it falls upon a deadly poison, it will cause deadly poison to grow; and if the rain falls upon burning weeds, it will cause burning weeds to grow.
וְאִם יַשְׁקֶה הַמָּטָר אֶת הַזְּרָעִים יִצְמַח זְרָעִים.
And if the rain waters the seeds, seeds will sprout.
כֵּן הַתּוֹרָה אֵצֶל הָאָדָם, אִם הָאָדָם הוּא מְבַקֵּשׁ רַק מַה שֶּׁרְצוֹנוֹ מַרְאֶה לוֹ אָז עוֹד יִצְמַח הָרָצוֹן גַּם מִן הַתּוֹרָה,
So too the Torah for a person: if a person seeks only what his will shows him, then the will will yet grow even from the Torah,
וְתִפְעֹל עָלָיו שֶׁהָרָצוֹן שֶׁלּוֹ תִּתְרַחֵב וְתִתְעַמֵּק יוֹתֵר וְיוֹתֵר.
And you should work upon him that his will should expand and deepen more and more.
אֲבָל אֵצֶל מִי שֶׁמְּבַקֵּשׁ לְתַקֵּן מִדּוֹתָיו,
But for one who seeks to fix his character traits,
אָז הַתּוֹרָה נַעֲשֶׂה לוֹ סַם חַיִּים וְיִבָּנֶה מִמֶּנָּהּ,
Then the Torah becomes for him a life-giving elixir, and he will be built up from it,
וּבְהֶכְרַח צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִרְדֹּף אַחַר הַמַּעֲשֶׂה לְהִנָּצֵל מִן סַכָּנַת סַם הַמָּוֶת.
And necessarily, a person must pursue the deed to be saved from the danger of the poison of death.
וַאֲפִלּוּ אִם יְבַקֵּשׁ אָדָם אֶת הַמַּעֲשֶׂה,
And even if a person seeks the deed,
גַּם בָּהּ יֵשׁ סַם חַיִּים וְסַם הַמָּוֶת,
Also within it there is a potion of life and a potion of death,
שֶׁאִם לֹא יִטֹּל רַק אֶת הַפְּעֻלָּה וְלֹא יַכְשִׁיר אֶת הַפּוֹעֵל אָז יוּכַל הַמַּעֲשֶׂה לְהֵהָפֵךְ לוֹ לְסַם הַמָּוֶת.
For if one takes only the action, but does not prepare the doer, then the deed can turn for him into a deadly poison.
וְאַף שֶׁבְּחָכְמַת הָרְפוּאָה אִם הָרוֹפֵא נוֹתֵן רְפוּאָה אֵין אָנוּ צְרִיכִין לִבְדֹּק אַחַר הָרוֹפֵא אִם הוּא עוֹשֶׂה לִשְׁמָהּ אוֹ לֹא,
And even though in the wisdom of medicine, if the doctor gives a remedy, we do not need to investigate after the doctor if he does it for its own sake or not,
לֹא כֵן אֵצֶל הַתּוֹרָה, הַכֹּל תָּלוּי בְּהַפּוֹעַל כָּל הַדְּבָרִים.
Not so with the Torah; everything depends on the actual doing of all the matters.
אֵצֶל אִישׁ הָאֱמֶת הַכֹּל אֱמֶת, וְאֵצֶל אִישׁ הַשֶּׁקֶר הַכֹּל שֶׁקֶר.
With a man of truth, everything is truth, and with a man of falsehood, everything is falsehood.
וְזֶה הוּא דָּבָר בָּרוּר אֲשֶׁר רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא כַּאֲשֶׁר רָאָה אֶת הַתּוֹרָה לֹא רָאָה בָּהּ אֶת חָכְמָתָהּ אוֹ חִיּוּבֵי הַמִּצְוֹת בִּלְבַד.
And this is a clear matter, that Rabbi Akiva, when he saw the Torah, did not see in it only its wisdom or the obligations of the mitzvos.
הוּא רָאָה כִּי הָעִקָּר מַה שֶּׁהַתּוֹרָה רוֹצָה הוּא אֲשֶׁר הָאָדָם יִהְיֶה בְּעַצְמוֹ תּוֹרָה חַיָּה שָׁלֵם בְּמִדּוֹתָיו עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה מֻפְשָׁט מִכָּל הַנְּגִיעוֹת,
He saw that the main thing the Torah wants is that a person should himself be a living Torah, complete in his character traits, until he is divested of all personal interests,
וְלֹא יִרְצֶה רַק אֶת רְצוֹן ה' בִּלְבָד,
And he will desire only the will of Hashem alone,
וּמָצָא בְּעַצְמוֹ אֵיךְ שֶׁמִּדּוֹתָיו נוֹטִים לְהַמְרוֹת הַבּוֹרֵא,
and he will find within himself how his character traits tend to rebel against the Creator,
וְרוֹצִים לְקָרֵב אֶת הַתּוֹרָה לְפִי רוּחָם וּמְמָאֲנִים לְבַטֵּל דַּעְתָּם מִפְּנֵי דַּעַת הַתּוֹרָה וְלִיקַּח אֶת הַתּוֹרָה עִם פְּשָׁרוֹת וְחֶשְׁבּוֹנוֹת רַבִּים,
And they want to bring the Torah close according to their spirit, and they refuse to nullify their opinion before the opinion of the Torah, and to take the Torah with many compromises and calculations,
עִם טְעָמִים וְאִמְתָּלוֹת וְתֵירוּצִים לְהַכְשִׁיר כָּל דְּרָכָיו בָּהֶם הָיָה חוֹזֵר בְּדַעְתּוֹ הָעֲמֻקָּה שֶׁיִּתָּכֵן לוֹ עַל יְדֵי זֶה עוֹד לָרֶדֶת מַטָּה מַטָּה,
with reasons and pretexts and excuses to justify all his ways, in which he would return in his deep thought that it is possible for him through this to descend further and further down,
עַד שֶׁתַּעֲשֶׂה לוֹ סַם הַמָּוֶת.
until you make for it the poison of death.
וְלָכֵן הָיָה לוֹ כָּל יָמָיו מִלְחָמָה חֲזָקָה לִבְחֹר אֶת הַתּוֹרָה אִם לָאו.
And therefore, he had all his days a strong war to choose the Torah or not.
אִם יִבְחַר שֶׁמָּא יֵהָפֵךְ לוֹ לְסַם הַמָּוֶת, אִם לֹא יִבְחוֹר בְּלִי תּוֹרָה וַדַּאי זֶה סַם הַמָּוֶת.
If he chooses, perhaps it will be transformed for him into a deadly poison; if he does not choose, without Torah, certainly this is a deadly poison.
וְלִבְחֹר אֶת הַתּוֹרָה בְּאוֹפֶן שֶׁתְּהֵא לוֹ לְסַם חַיִּים,
And to choose the Torah in such a way that it should be for him a life-giving elixir,
הָיָה מְסֻפָּק אִם זֶה יָכוֹל לִהְיוֹת,
He was in doubt if this could be,
אֲשֶׁר הַתּוֹרָה יְבָרֵר אֶת הַמִּדּוֹת שֶׁלּוֹ וִיתַקְּנֵם עַל פִּי רוּחָהּ עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה אָדָם כָּזֶה אֲשֶׁר הוּא בְּעַצְמוֹ הַתּוֹרָה,
that the Torah will clarify his character traits and rectify them according to its spirit, until he will be such a person who is himself the Torah,
בְּלִי שׁוּם פְּשָׁרוֹת וְחֶשְׁבּוֹנוֹת,
without any compromises or calculations,
בְּלִי שׁוּם נְגִיעָה כְּלָל, מוּכָן וּמְזוּמָּן לַעֲשׂוֹת כֹּל מַה שֶּׁהַתּוֹרָה תִּדְרֹשׁ מִמֶּנּוּ,
without any personal interest whatsoever, ready and prepared to do everything the Torah will demand of him,
עַד שֶׁבָּא אֵצֶל הָאֶבֶן וְשָׁאַל מִי חָקַק אֶבֶן זֶה,
until he came to the stone and asked, 'Who carved this stone?'
וְאָמְרוּ לוֹ:
And they said to him:
עֲקִיבָא, אִי אַתָּה יוֹדֵעַ אֲבָנִים שָׁחֲקוּ מַיִם?
Akiva, do you not know, 'stones are worn away by water'?
מִיָּד עָשָׂה קַל וָחֹמֶר בְּעַצְמוֹ, וּמָה רַק פָּסַל אֶת הַקָּשֶׁה דִּבְרֵי תוֹרָה עַל אַחַת כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה שֶׁיֵּחָקְקוּ לִבּוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם,
Immediately he made a kal vachomer (an a fortiori argument) to himself: if just the hard words of Torah were rejected, all the more so that they should be engraved upon a person's heart.
וְהִכִּיר מִמִּילֵי דְעָלְמָא אֲשֶׁר יָכוֹל בֶּאֱמֶת הַתּוֹרָה לַחֲקֹק לִבּוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם.
And he recognized from the matters of the world that the Torah can truly engrave a person's heart.
אִם הוּא אָדָם כָּזֶה אֲשֶׁר לוֹקֵחַ אֶת הַתּוֹרָה לֹא לְשׁוּם מַטָּרָה אַחֶרֶת,
If he is such a person who takes the Torah not for any other purpose,
וְלֹא לְשׁוּם חֶשְׁבּוֹן זָר, כִּי אִם שֶׁיַּחְקוֹק אֶת לִבּוֹ,
And not for any foreign calculation, but rather that he should engrave upon his heart,
כְּמוֹ הַמַּיִם אֶת הָאֶבֶן, וְיַעֲשֶׂה הַכֹּל לְשֵׁם שָׁמַיִם,
like water [wearing down] a stone, and he will do everything for the sake of Heaven,
אָז פּוֹעֵל עַל לִבּוֹ הַתּוֹרָה שֶׁיִּתְהַפֵּךְ לִבּוֹ לְטוֹבָה וְיִתְאַחֵד וְיִתְעַצֵּם בּוֹ הַתּוֹרָה.
Then the Torah acts upon his heart, that his heart should be transformed for good, and the Torah should be unified and strengthened within him.
וְלָפִי שֶׁכָּל סְפֵקָתוֹ הָיָה אִם הוּא יָכוֹל לְקַיֵּם אֶת הַתּוֹרָה עִם בֵּרוּר הַמִּדּוֹת,
And because his entire doubt was if he could fulfill the Torah with the clarification of his middos,
לָכֵן מָצָא מֵהַקַּל וָחֹמֶר אֶת הַיְסוֹד,
Therefore, he found the foundation from the kal v'chomer,
אֲשֶׁר יוּכַל לְקַיֵּם אֶת הַתּוֹרָה עִם בֵּרוּר הַמִּדּוֹת,
who will be able to fulfill the Torah with the clarification of his middos,
כִּי מַה רַךְ פָּסַל אֶת הַקָּשֶׁה, אִם הָרַךְ יִפְעַל בִּתְמִידוּת רַק לִפְסֹל אֶת הַקָּשֶׁה,
For how did the soft disqualify the hard, if the soft will act with constancy only to disqualify the hard,
דִּבְרֵי תוֹרָה עַל אַחַת כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה אִם לֹא יִרְצֶה רַק אֶת הַלִּשְׁמָהּ,
Words of Torah, all the more so, if he will desire only for their own sake,
הַיְינוּ הַלֵּב הַטָּהוֹר, כְּמַה שֶׁכָּתוּב מִכָּל מִשְׁמָר נְצוֹר לִבֶּךָ (מִשְׁלֵי ד׳ כ״ג),
This means the pure heart, as it is written, "More than any guarding, guard your heart" (Mishlei 4:23).
אָז וַדַּאי יִפְעֹל עָלָיו הַתּוֹרָה,
Then surely the Torah will act upon him,
שֶׁיִּהְיֶה אָדָם אֲשֶׁר הוּא בְּעַצְמוֹ הַתּוֹרָה הַבְּרוּרָה,
that a person should be, he himself, the clear Torah,
הַמְנוּפֶּה מִכָּל מִדּוֹתָיו וּנְטִיּוֹתָיו.
He who is sifted from all his character traits and inclinations.
וּבָזֶה מוּבָן עִנְיַן הַגֵּר שֶׁבָּא אֵצֶל שַׁמַּאי וְאָמַר לוֹ גַּיְּרֵנִי עַל מְנָת שֶׁתְּלַמְּדֵנִי כָּל הַתּוֹרָה כֻּלָּהּ עַל רֶגֶל אַחַת,
And with this is understood the matter of the convert who came to Shammai and said to him, 'Convert me on condition that you teach me the entire Torah while standing on one foot,'
דָּחֲפוּ בֶּאֱמֶת הַבִּנְיָן (שַׁבָּת ל״א).
They pushed away the truth of the building (Shabbos 31a).
וְיִתָּכֵן שֶׁאָמַר לוֹ בָּזֶה אֲשֶׁר כָּל הַבִּנְיָן קָטָן אוֹ גָּדוֹל צָרִיךְ לְהִבָּנוֹת עַל פִּי מִדָּה מְדֻיֶּקֶת,
And it is possible that he said to him with this, that every building, small or large, needs to be built according to a precise measure,
וְהַתּוֹרָה אֲשֶׁר אֲרֻכָּה הִיא מֵאֶרֶץ מִדָּה וּרְחָבָה מִנִּי יָם אַתָּה רוֹצֶה לִלְמוֹד עַל רֶגֶל אַחַת מִבְּלִי מִדּוֹת וְכַלְלֵי הַתּוֹרָה?
And the Torah, which is longer than the earth's measure and wider than the sea, you want to learn on one foot, without the Torah's measures and rules?
בָּא אֵצֶל הִלֵּל אָמַר לוֹ מַה דְּעָלָךְ סָנֵי לְחַבְרָךְ לֹא תַּעֲבִיד וְאִידָךְ וְכוּ׳.
He came to Hillel, he said to him, 'What is hateful to you, do not do to your friend,' and the rest, etc.
צְרִיכִין אָנוּ לְהָבִין בַּמֶּה פָּטַר אוֹתוֹ, וּמַה דַּוְקָא כָּלַל הַכֹּל בְּעִקָּר הַזֶּה הַנּוֹבֵעַ מִמַּאֲמַר הַתּוֹרָה?
We need to understand with what He exempted him, and why specifically He included everything in this principle that stems from the Torah's statement?
אָמְנָם אִם נִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּמַהוּת הַתּוֹרָה נִמְצָא כִּי עִקַּר מַהוּתָהּ הִיא בֵּרוּר הַמִּדּוֹת.
However, if we contemplate the essence of the Torah, we will find that its primary essence is the clarification of character traits.
וְהָרְאָיָה כִּי בְּעֵת שֶׁשָּׁאֲלוּ הַמַּלְאָכִים תְּנָה הוֹדְךָ עַל הַשָּׁמַיִם עָנָה לָהֶם מָרָא דְעָלְמָא כְּלוּם קִנְאָה יֵשׁ בֵּינֵיכֶם,
And the proof is that when the angels asked, "Place Your glory upon the heavens," the Master of the Universe answered them, "Is there any jealousy among you?"
יֵצֶר הָרַע יֵשׁ בֵּינֵיכֶם (שַׁבָּת ק"ה).
The yetzer hara is among you (Shabbos 105a).
הֲרֵי לָנוּ מִזֶּה אֲשֶׁר הַתּוֹרָה נִתְּנָה לָאָדָם מִפְּנֵי שֶׁעַל יְדֵי זֶה יִשְׁתַּלֵּם צוּרַת הָרוּחָנִיּוּת עַד שֶׁיִּקָּרֵא בְּשֵׁם אָדָם,
We see from this that the Torah was given to man because through it the form of his spirituality will be perfected until he is called by the name 'man',
כִּי הַמִּדּוֹת הָרָעוֹת שֶׁיֵּשׁ בּוֹ,
For the bad character traits that are in him,
עַל יְדֵי כָּךְ מִתְמַעֵט אִישִׁיּוּתוֹ הָרוּחָנִית עַד שֶׁנַּעֲשֶׂה אֵינוֹ רָאוּי לְהִקָּרֵא אָדָם,
Through this, his spiritual personality diminishes until he becomes unworthy of being called a human being,
וְאִם נִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּכָל הַמִּדּוֹת כּוּלָּם נִמְצָא כִּי הֵמָּה כְּחֹמֶר הַיּוּלִי וְלֹא נוּכַל לְהַחְלִיט עֲלֵיהֶם וּלְכַנּוֹתָם בְּשֵׁם רַע,
And if we contemplate all the middos, we will find that they are like primordial matter, and we cannot decide about them and call them by the name 'bad',
כְּמוֹ שֶׁלֹּא נוּכַל לְהַחְלִיט וּלְכַנּוֹתָם בְּשֵׁם טוֹב,
Just as we cannot decide and call them by a good name,
אֶלָּא הַמִּדּוֹת בְּעַצְמָם אֵינָם לֹא טוֹב וְלֹא רַע,
Rather, the middos themselves are neither good nor bad,
אֶלָּא בְּחִינַת הַטּוֹב וְהָרַע מִתְחַלֵּף לְפִי שִׁמּוּשׁ הָאָדָם בָּהֶם,
Rather, the aspect of good and evil changes according to a person's use of them,
אִם יִשְׁתַּמֵּשׁ בְּכָל אֶחָד בִּמְקוֹמוֹ וּבְעִתּוֹ,
If he will use each one in its proper place and at its proper time,
כְּמוֹ שֶׁצָּרִיךְ, אֲזַי הוּא בִּכְלָל טוֹב,
as is proper, then he is entirely good,
אֲבָל אִם יִשְׁתַּמֵּשׁ שֶׁלֹּא בִּמְקוֹמוֹ וְשֶׁלֹּא בִּזְמַנּוֹ וְלֹא לְפִי הַצֹּרֶךְ אֶלָּא לְפִי רְצוֹנוֹ הֵם בִּכְלַל רָע.
But if one uses them not in their proper place, and not at their proper time, and not according to the need, but rather according to his own will, they are included in the category of evil.
וְהַהִשְׁתַּמְּשׁוּת הַזֹּאת תְּלוּיָה בְּחוּט הַשַּׂעֲרָה.
And this usage is dependent on a hair's breadth.
וְהוּא דָּבָר הַמָּסוּר לַלֵּב, וְהוּא שֶׁיֵּשׁ קִנְאָה גְּרוּעָה אֲשֶׁר רִקֵּב עַצְמוֹ קִנְאָה.
And this is a matter entrusted to the heart, and it is that there is a base jealousy, which jealousy itself rotted.
וְיֵשׁ קִנְאַת סוֹפְרִים אֲשֶׁר תַּרְבֶּה חָכְמָה.
And there is the jealousy of scribes, which increases wisdom.
וְיָכוֹל הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה לְהִתְחַלֵּף אֵצֶל הָאָדָם וְיוּכַל לַחְשֹׁב עַל קִנְאָתוֹ אֲשֶׁר הִיא בֶּאֱמֶת רֶקֶב עֲצָמוֹת שֶׁהִיא קִנְאַת סוֹפְרִים.
And this matter can become confused for a person, and he can think about his jealousy, which is truly 'rottenness of the bones' (Proverbs 14:30), that it is 'the jealousy of scribes' (Bava Basra 21a).
וְהַרְגָּשַׁת הַקִּנְאָה אַחַת הִיא אֶלָּא יִתְחַלֵּף לְפִי כַּוָּנָתוֹ אִם יִדְאַג עַל מַה שֶּׁאֵין לוֹ,
And the feeling of jealousy is one, but it will differ according to his intention: if he worries over what he does not have,
אוֹ עַל מַה שֶׁיֵּשׁ לַחֲבֵרוֹ, וְיִרְצֶה בָּזֶה אֲשֶׁר לֹא יִהְיֶ' לוֹ וְגַם לֹא לַחֲבֵרוֹ.
Or about what his friend has, and he will desire by this that it should not be for him and also not for his friend.
וְצָרִיךְ לְבָרֵר מִדּוֹתָיו לְהַרְגִּישׁ הֵיטֵב רְצוֹנוֹ אֶל מַה מְגַמָּתוֹ וּמַה הוּא חָפֵץ אִם הוּא בִּמְקוֹמוֹ אִם לָאו.
And one needs to clarify his character traits, to feel well his will, to what is his intention, and what he desires, if it is in its proper place or not.
וְכֵן יֵשׁ גַּאֲוָה בָּאָדָם שֶׁהִיא בִּכְלַל תּוֹעֲבַת ה' כָּל גְּבַהּ לֵב.
And similarly, there is haughtiness in a person, which is included in 'Hashem detests all who are proud of heart.'
וְיֵשׁ לִפְעָמִים שֶׁיִּגְבַּהּ לִבּוֹ בְּדַרְכֵי הַשֵּׁם שֶׁהִיא בְּחִינָה עֶלְיוֹנָה וְעִנְיָן נִרְצֶה,
And there are times that his heart will be uplifted in the ways of Hashem, which is a lofty level and a desired matter,
וְצָרִיךְ לְבָרֵר מִדּוֹתָיו מִפְּנֵי מָה נִתְגָּאָה,
And one needs to clarify his character traits, because of what did he become haughty,
אִם מִפְּנֵי שֶׁיֵּשׁ לוֹ דֶּרֶךְ גְּבוֹהָה אֲשֶׁר יָכוֹל כָּל יָמָיו לָלֶכֶת מַעְלָה מַעְלָה,
If because he has a lofty path upon which he can go up and up all his days,
וּלְהַטּוֹת אֶת מִדּוֹתָיו עַד קְצֵה הָאַחֲרוֹן,
and to incline his character traits until the very last edge,
וְהַדֶּרֶךְ יָרוּם אֶת לִבּוֹ לִמְסֹר אֵלֶיהָ אִם זֶה הוּא הֲרֵי הוּא טוֹב,
And the path will elevate his heart to dedicate himself to it, if this is it, then it is good,
וְאִם יִתְגָּאֶה מִפְּנֵי שֶׁמַּעֲלֶה עַל דַּעְתּוֹ לְהַעֲרִיךְ מַעֲלוֹתָיו מוּל מַעֲלוֹת חֲבֵירָיו,
And if he becomes haughty because he brings to mind to evaluate his virtues against the virtues of his friends,
וּמַכְרִיעַ אֶת עַצְמוֹ בְּמַעֲלָה, וּמִפְּנֵי זֶה מִתְגָּאֶה,
and he sways himself toward a higher level, and because of this he becomes haughty,
הֲרֵי זֶה תּוֹעֲבַת ה'.
Behold, this is an abomination to Hashem.
מַצְדִּיק רָשָׁע וּמַרְשִׁיעַ צַדִּיק תּוֹעֲבַת ה' גַּם שְׁנֵיהֶם (משלי י"ג).
He who justifies the wicked and he who condemns the righteous, both of them are an abomination to Hashem (Mishlei 17:15).
בֵּיאוּרוֹ, מִדֶּרֶךְ הַמִּשְׁפָּט בָּעוֹלָם לִהְיוֹת בֵּירוּר הַדִּין עַל יְדֵי קָטֵגוֹר וְסָנֵגוֹר.
Its explanation: it is the way of judgment in the world for the clarification of the law to be through a prosecutor and a defender.
וְתַפְקִיד הַקָּטֵגוֹר הוּא רַק לְלַמֵּד חוֹב, וְתַפְקִיד הַסָּנֵגוֹר הוּא רַק לְלַמֵּד זְכוּת.
And the role of the prosecutor is only to teach guilt, and the role of the defender is only to teach merit.
וְאִם נִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּמַהוּתָם וְנִשְׁאַל אֶת הַקָּטֵגוֹר מִפְּנֵי מָה בָּחַרְתָּ בַּתַּפְקִיד לְלַמֵּד חוֹב דַּוְקָא,
And if we contemplate their essence and ask the prosecutor, 'Why did you choose the role to teach obligation specifically?'
אִם יַעֲנֶה, אֲנִי מְלַמֵּד חוֹב מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהַמִּשְׁפָּט דּוֹרֵשׁ אֲשֶׁר יִהְיֶה אֶחָד קָטֵגוֹר,
If he answers, I teach a debt, because the judgment demands that there be one prosecutor,
מְבִינִים אָנוּ שֶׁאֵין זֶה אֱמֶת,
We understand that this is not truth,
שֶׁהֲרֵי גַּם הַמִּשְׁפָּט דּוֹרֵשׁ לִהְיוֹת סָנֵגוֹר,
For even the judgment demands to be an advocate,
וְלָמָּה לֹא בָּחַר לִהְיוֹת סָנֵיגוֹר אֶלָּא דַּוְקָא קָטֵיגוֹר.
And why did he not choose to be a defender, but specifically an accuser?
וְאִם נֹאמַר כִּי לָכֵן בָּחַר לִהְיוֹת קָטֵגוֹר מִפְּנֵי שֶׁטִּבְעוֹ יֵשׁ לוֹ עַיִן רָעָה,
And if we say that therefore he chose to be an accuser because his nature has an evil eye,
וְהוּא נוֹטֶה לִרְאוֹת רַק הַחוֹב שֶׁבָּאָדָם,
And he tends to see only the debt in a person,
וְקָשֶׁה לוֹ לְפִי טִבְעוֹ לִרְאוֹת הַזְּכֻיּוֹת,
And it is difficult for him, according to his nature, to see the merits,
נֵדַע כִּי דְּבַר אֱמֶת בְּפִיו, שֶׁמִּפְּנֵי זֶה בָּחַר לִהְיוֹת קָטֵגוֹר מִפְּנֵי שֶׁטִּבְעוֹ נוֹטֶה רַק לְלַמֵּד קִטְרוּג דַּוְקָא,
We will know that a true word is in his mouth, that because of this he chose to be a prosecutor, because his nature tends only to teach accusation specifically,
וְגַם הַמִּשְׁפָּט דּוֹרֵשׁ קָטֵגוֹר לָכֵן קִבֵּל עָלָיו הַתַּפְקִיד הַזֶּה.
And also the judgment demands a prosecutor, therefore he accepted upon himself this role.
וְהַגַּם שֶׁהוּא חִסָּרוֹן בָּאָדָם מִפְּנֵי שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִרְאוֹת כָּל הַצְּדָדִים הֵן הַחוֹב וְהֵן הַזְּכוּת.
And even though it is a deficiency in a person, because a person needs to see all sides, both the liability and the merit.
אָמְנָם אַחַר שֶׁהוּא רַק מְמַלֵּא תַּפְקִידוֹ אַף שֶׁמַּרְשִׁיעַ לָרָשָׁע וְגַם לַצַּדִּיק וּבְעֵת שֶׁגּוֹרֵם לְהַרְשִׁיעַ אֶת הַצַּדִּיק יָצָא מִכְשׁוֹל עַל יָדוֹ,
However, since it is only fulfilling its role, even though it causes the wicked to sin and also the righteous, and at the time it causes the righteous to sin, a stumbling block comes about through it,
בְּכָל זֹאת הֲלֹא בְּעֵת שֶׁיִּגָּרֵם לְהַרְשִׁיעַ אֶת הָרָשָׁע יֵצֵא עַל יָדוֹ דָּבָר נָכוֹן הַנִּצְרָךְ לְתִקּוּן הָעוֹלָם,
Nevertheless, behold, at the time that it will be caused for the wicked one to be wicked, a correct matter, which is needed for the rectification of the world, will come out through him,
וְהוּא חַי רַק עַל פִּי טִבְעוֹ תָּמִיד וְלֹא יִסְתּוֹר אֶת עַצְמוֹ,
And he lives only according to his nature always, and he will not contradict himself,
כִּי הוּא אָדָם כָּזֶה אֲשֶׁר תָּמִיד עַל הַכֹּל יִרְאֶה רַק הַחוֹב.
For he is such a person who will always see only the obligation in everything.
נִמְצָא הֲגַם שֶׁהוּא חִסָּרוֹן, אֲבָל לֹא נוּכַל לִתְבֹּעַ מִמֶּנּוּ כָּל כָּךְ עַל זֶה כִּי הוּא יָכוֹל לַעֲנוֹת אֵינִי יָכוֹל לִכְפּוֹת אֶת טִבְעִי וַאֲנִי מִתְנַהֵג רַק עַל יְדֵי טִבְעִי.
It turns out that even though it is a deficiency, we cannot demand so much from him for this, because he can answer, 'I cannot force my nature, and I only behave according to my nature.'
וְכֵן אִם נִשְׁאַל אֶת הַסָּנֵיגוֹר מִפְּנֵי מָה אַתָּה סָנֵיגוֹר,
And so too, if we would ask the advocate, 'For what reason are you an advocate?'
אִם יֹאמַר לָנוּ כִּי מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהַמִּשְׁפָּט דּוֹרֵשׁ זֹאת נֹאמַר לוֹ,
If he will say to us that because the judgment demands this, we will say to him,
הֲלֹא הַמִּשְׁפָּט דּוֹרֵשׁ גַּם כֵּן לְקָטֵגוֹר וְלָמָּה בָּחַרְתָּ דַּוְקָא לִהְיוֹת סָנֵגוֹר.
Does not the judgment also require a prosecutor, and why did you specifically choose to be a defender?
וְאִם יֹאמַר שֶׁבָּחַר דַּוְקָא לִלְמוֹד זְכוּת מִפְּנֵי שֶׁקָּשֶׁה לוֹ מִפְּנֵי מִזְגּוֹ הַטּוֹבָה לִרְאוֹת חִסָּרוֹן עַל חֲבֵרוֹ וְטִבְעוֹ נוֹטֶה לַחְתּוֹר וְלִרְאוֹת רַק הַמַּעֲלוֹת וְהַזְּכֻיּוֹת שֶׁיֵּשׁ בָּאָדָם וּלְפִי שֶׁגַּם הַמִּשְׁפָּט צָרִיךְ לְסַנֵּיגוֹר לָכֵן בָּחַר בְּתַפְקִיד הַזֶּה,
And if he will say that he chose specifically to find merit because it is difficult for him, due to his good nature, to see a flaw in his fellow, and his nature tends to seek out and see only the good qualities and merits that are in a person, and since even the judgment needs a defender, therefore he chose this role,
מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהוּא יוֹתֵר מְסֻגָּל לָזֶה,
because he is more suited for this,
גַּם בָּזֶה נֶאֱמַר, הַגַּם שֶׁהוּא חִסָּרוֹן בֶּאֱמֶת אֲשֶׁר צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִרְאוֹת כָּל הַצְּדָדִים,
Also regarding this it is said, even though it is truly a deficiency that a person needs to see all sides,
וְכָמוֹ שֶׁצָּרִיךְ לְכַבֵּד כָּל אֶחָד,
And just as one must honor every single person,
צָרִיךְ גַּם כֵּן שֶׁיּוּכַל לַחְשֹׁד כָּל אֶחָד,
One must also be able to suspect everyone,
שֶׁאִם יִצְדַּק בִּזְכוּתוֹ אֵצֶל הַצַּדִּיק,
that if he will be justified through his merit before the tzaddik,
אֲבָל יֵרָשַׁע בָּזֶה אֵצֶל הָרָשָׁע,
But he will be considered wicked in this by the wicked one,
נִמְצָא עָלָיו זְכוּת אַחֵר שֶׁהוּא חִסָּרוֹן תְּמִידִי.
A merit is found upon him, specifically that he has a constant deficiency.
וְאִם כִּי יִכָּשֵׁל בִּרְצוֹנוֹ לְהַצְדִּיק הָרָשָׁע הֲלֹא יַעֲשֶׂה טוֹבָה רַבָּה בְּתַפְקִידוֹ בְּעֵת שֶׁיִּגָּרֵם לְהַצְדִּיק אֶת הַצַּדִּיק.
And even if he stumbles in his desire to justify the wicked one, will he not do a great good in his role when he causes the righteous one to be justified?
We must strive to make the Torah alive within us, letting it refine our middos and guide every action, just like water carves stone. Let's constantly examine our intentions, ensuring our avodah is pure and our middos are truly for Hashem's will, not our own desires, so the Torah becomes a true elixir of life for us.